Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
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