sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
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