oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Randomize
