So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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