did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize