Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(813): View more from Florida

I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life

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(306): View more from Saskatchewan

I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.

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(413): View more from Massachusetts

My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.

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(573): View more from Missouri

Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.

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(337): View more from Louisiana

I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.

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(613): View more from Ontario

On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?

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(586): View more from Michigan

He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.

(248): View more from Michigan

Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.

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(508): View more from Massachusetts

I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.

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