I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
