i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
