how do flat chested girls get laid?
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
Randomize
