whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
