IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
