u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
Randomize
