ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
she looked like the before picture.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Randomize
