Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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