Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
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