erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
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