I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
