we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
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