I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize