My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
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