i wish peter jackson would direct porn
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
