Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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