yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I just sucked dick on a ferry
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize