smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize
