Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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