I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
