Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Randomize
