everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Randomize
