oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Randomize
