why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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