Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
Randomize
