I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
