He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
