4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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