please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
wow bdsm is so cute
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
