I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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