You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Randomize
