Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
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