Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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