I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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