Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
