Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
