I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
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