everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
Congratulations! We have a period
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
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