I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
I hope mine doesn't look like that
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Randomize
