If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
