I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
