Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
I like my sex mixed with concussions.
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Randomize
