my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Randomize
