what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
