that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
