First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize